When Fate Made Me Cry In Front Of Her
When in the throes of pain and rough life,
I often go for a walk near my home,
The path is secluded,
And only walkers inhabit it
Today I seemed to have more burdens than before –
As the balm of walking was not working,
After persisting for a while I realized
There was something wrong with the works.
The social cannibalism of the past year
Had broken my will somewhere,
There was no light I could see,
No mountains to cheer me up.
A man can only swim so long
As he has free water in front of him,
You can be incarcerated in your sorrows,
Incapacitated in your fitness.
The only out I saw in my malady
Was to call her and bare my burden,
But my stigmas were powerful
And capacity to suffer large.
After days of undiminished suffering
I turned mad to find a relief,
The only thing I could think was
To call her right away.
I called her during the thick layers of the night,
When the scene was eerie,
And loneliness was crushing –
Thoughts seemed to echo back.
I woke her up without offering excuse,
After exchanging perfunctory greetings
I tried coming to the point,
But burst into a sob.
The sob lingered for a while,
With stone-silence from her,
Regaining some control
I apologized for my misbehavior.
Finding an opening she took charge
And encouraged me to continue sobbing,
Without inquiring about the reason for it –
A strange therapy.
When tears started to dry out
I told her about my shame,
She appealed that it was good to cry
To uncoil the disturbed soul.
After the call it felt the surf
Of pain had receded though not gone,
But I knew I will remember forever
When fate made me cry in front of her.
Suffern, New York, August 31, 2016
maharaj.kaul@yahoo.com